New Year’s Resolutions being a thing of the past
When I was growing up, and even into adulthood, people would always be asking each other “what is your new year’s resolution” right before the new year was about to hit. And, me not knowing any differently, would always try to come up with something to change for the new year. This would go on for several days, and often the weeks before the new year. When I was in school one of my new year resolutions would be “next year I don’t want to procrastinate so much.” That generally lasted a couple of months, if I was lucky, and then it went by the wayside. According to StatisticBrain.com some of the top resolutions include stopping smoking, lose weight, stay fit and healthy, and save more and spend less. Their statistics also show that only 8% of people are successful in achieving their resolutions. Often times, people set goals and feel like they’ve failed when they don’t accomplish them.
Moving towards setting intentions
This brings me to my next thought of changing the way we enter the new year. In the few years, I have become more aware of social media and people around me talking about “setting an intention”. By setting an intention I am referring to thinking about how you want to live, engage in the world, and get the most out of your life while looking towards the future. When you lack intention, that’s when you may stray from your path, or you can feel like you’re lacking focus in your life. The great thing about setting an intention is that you can make this a daily, weekly, monthly, or yearly process.
You also might have different intentions for different time periods. For example, one of my daily intentions is to be mindful of how I interact with those around me, my thoughts, actions, and my speech. Another daily intention, moving into 2019 is to be more mindful about my schedule on a daily basis. An example of a yearly intention is paying more attention to my health, and think about how I am caring for myself. This is different than saying “for my new year’s resolution I want to lose 20 pounds and am going to stay away from junk food. According to mindfulminutes.com, setting an intention should not be confused with a goal. They refer to an intention as “… an aim, a purpose, or attitude you’d be proud to commit to.” It’s like the old Buddhist saying “what you think what you become.”
5 Tips to Start Helping You Set Intentions
Here are some ways to set positive intentions in your life, whether that be for new year’s, or every day of the week.
- First and foremost, make your intention positive. The more you are positive in your life, the more you will attract positive things. That may be something related to your personal life, work life, or spiritual life. Whatever it is for you, the importance of positivity is key in setting a successful intention.
- Secondly, set realistic intentions, with realistic time frames. You know how some people say “the bigger, the better.” Well, when setting an intention, it’s probably the opposite. You want to set yourself up for success, which might mean smaller, more frequent intention setting. Just like in the example I gave earlier, waking up and setting an intention for the day gets you started on the right foot.
- Next, write your intentions down. Get a separate journal or notebook, and keep track of your intentions. You can add to that in any way you like, or just have it as a list for your reference. Similar to when you write down what you’re grateful for, this creates a larger chance of your gaining something from the process of setting your intentions.
- Some people find that sharing their intention with a friend, co-worker, or loved one, they are not only held more accountable, but are able to receive support from those people in helping you stayed focused on your intention.
- Lastly, if you are setting a daily intention, try to spend some time meditating, or using mindfulness techniques. This helps clear your mind and really focus on what your intention is for that day. If you are saying “I don’t have time to meditate”, all it takes is 5 minutes. Do it when you first wake up. That’s part of setting the intention as well.
If you are interested in learning more about how making 2019 a great year, and setting intentions can be helpful in your daily life, please feel free to contact me by email or by phone at 805-405-4746
Norine Vander Hooven is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker in Westlake Village, California, and has been in practice for over 30 years. Norine specializes in trauma, depression, anxiety, and suicide prevention. Norine is also certified in EMDR and uses this to work with people with PTSD and severe anxiety. Norine works with young adults and adults, and couples.